ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
