i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
