Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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