If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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