I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
