I wanna bring you to show and tell
ugly people sure do ruin things
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
