Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Randomize