whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
FUCK WHALES
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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