so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
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