real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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