fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
The chlamydia really affected his face.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Randomize
