dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize