people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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