she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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