He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
