I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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