11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
We are all done wearing pants today
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