Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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