Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
