id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
