also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
