doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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