What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
