barbara walters just said penis...
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
