Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
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