Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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