I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
COCAINE IS GR8
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
