If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
