I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Randomize
