i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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