Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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