and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Who died my cat blue again?
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
