You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize