what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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