she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
