Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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