Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Randomize
