Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
