He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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