Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
