But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Randomize
