how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I AM VODKA MAN
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Randomize
