dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
It's just like the Real World with babies
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize