Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
My pussy is not your playground.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
