yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
