i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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