I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
