Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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