I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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