sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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